Sunday, December 7, 2008

Dreams


What causes dreams? Why do sometimes you remember your dreams vividly and other times not remember them at all? How do we know if we even do have dreams. Maybe we don't have them at all and just think we do and believe that we just don't recall them. I hate the dreams that awaken you in a cold sweat or the ones where you fall, trip, or stumble over and right when you are about to hit the ground with a splat you are hit with a jolt of your body waking you up. I wonder if you actually did hit the ground...would you die? If you didn't wake up and that jolt of your body telling you "hello its time to wake up now" didn't come what would happen. What do dreams mean? There is a website talking about what each dream means and interpreting each one in alphabetical order. Are dreams a part of your mind? Are they apart of you and your deepest darkest thoughts? Are they a foreseeing of the future? Can they become real? Is that what de ja vu is all about? I have de ja vu sometimes and it is so weird. I remember have dreams of what is happening in my real life and it is the strangest most out of body experiences I have ever experienced. I have seen on T.V. that some people claim to have seen missing people in their dreams without knowing them. They can go find the person and save their lives just by having a dream. Is that a coincidence or is it fate? I guess there are so many questions that can go through a persons mind. So many questions and so little time. I would like to know if there are studies that show correlation between thoughts of a person and dreams. Maybe you only have dreams certain times because of specific reasons. Who really knows. What do I believe?? I have reoccurring dreams. Strange I know. I have had good dreams, scary dreams, bad dreams, and those dreams where you wake up in the morning wondering What the hell was that about? Sometimes you wake up and not recall you were dreaming at all. I think dreams are a part of the mind. Possibly what we truly think about things, sometimes things that correlate with our lives, sometimes maybe they have nothing to do with us as people but matter in a bigger light. Dreams are certain things that cannot truly be explained or conquered. Everyone has their own set of beliefs I assume when it comes to dreams. Now I am curious what those would be and how others would define them. Until then I hope this gives you some insight to what I think about. Sweet Dreams:)

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Politics


When I first took government in high school I loved it. It was so enjoyable for me and being able to take part in the caucuses in January it was really fun. I wanted to listen to the candidates and take them all in. I think having the right to vote is a privilege not a right. As a woman we have come a long way from when we did not have the right to vote. I wanted to make my own opinions on what I liked and didn't like with the candidates running and not listen to my parents opinions unless I had questions. I think all too many times you see young voters vote for the candidate their parents vote for because they do not do their own research or they only know what their parents say and do. Looking at all the candidates I found that I am a liberal and at heart a democrat. I was deciding between Barack Obama and Hilary Clinton. I am a fan of both but Barack Obama just stood out to me. I went to watch him speak on break in Des Moines at a local high school and he was amazing. He was so concerned with things that I cared about. I met him and shook his hand and he gave me a hug. It felt real. It was heartfelt. He found out that a girl's brother came back from Iraq and had killed himself a while after he got home. He first apologized for her loss and then proceeded to explain what he would do to change this. He also pulled her out of the crowd and put his arm around her and talked to her about her loss and how this happened. All in all I am so excited to finally vote in November and I am hoping that the rest of the people my age realize how important this really is.

Worst Weather Ever!

Soooo...The worst weather ever has approached us! It sucks walking to class in cold rain! Rainboots are so binding. I love mine but they are so tight! Uck! Yesterday was a nice day until later in the day and it got really windy and cloudy out. 3 quizzes today. Woo hoo. Not! I don't have any money until Friday and I still need to apply for jobs! I need a J-O-B! I really don't think I have that much time for a job and I really don't want to get one. Afterall I will be working for the rest of my life!!! Oh well it will be extra money and hopefully I get a good job! I'm looking at two places right now and I need to apply by the end of the day. I don't feel like a nineteen year old. I feel so much older than that. It's very strange. I don't like the feeling of growing up and not needing my parents anymore and doing everything on my own. It makes me sad and happy at the same time.
Maybe I will be like Peter Pan and never grow up and fight pirates and hang out with tinkerbell. That sounds like a good time to me. Fly off to never never land and fly around big ben late at night on the way. Now that's the life. However one thing that I am looking forward to is Halloween! I love Halloween! Candy, costumes, decorations, fun times I love all of it. I can't wait to see all the little kids to come trick or treating and see their cute little costumes and hear their funny jokes! The best Halloween movie is Hocus Pocus! I love it!

Friday, December 5, 2008

Fuzzy Scarves and Fresh air

Life is an unusual thing to think about. At times it is too much to comprehend and I believe that my mind could never fully wrap around the idea of it. I could think for hours at a time about life. I think everyone has different definitions of life such as, You live and you die and that is all it's about. Others like to compare life to a roller coaster ride. There are ups and downs but either way your on the ride and you have to take it for what it's worth even if it isn't enjoyable. I like to think about life in both aspects. There are good times, bad times, great times and worse times. You might be in significant, or you might be the center of all. Either way you are alive. Either way you are living and you are in charge of your life. It is all about choices. The next question that comes along is...are some choices fate or is everything sporadic? Do things happen for a reason? Do people die for a reason? Or was it just a coincidence? I suppose we will never know. How do you know if you actually made a difference in this world? Sometimes you feel like Hey, I am just one person what will it matter if I do it? I'm only one person I can't make a difference. I told this to my dad about something or another and he told me a story. An old man was walking along a beach throwing starfish that had been washed up on the sand back into the ocean. A younger guy in his 30's was strolling by stopped and said, " what are you doing? Throwing back one doesn't make a difference there are at least a hundred still on the beach." The old man smiled and picked up another one and threw it back and said, " It made a difference to that one." Starfish Pictures, Images and Photos
This story still makes me smile. And I will remember it for the rest of my life. A smile can change the world. Your smile can change the world. Now that to me is the definition of life.

Christmas Time

Christmas time is so much fun! I love this time of year minus the 14 degree weather. That part sucks but when we get the first real snow with the fluffy type of snow not the wet crap that turns into dirty slush but the real fluffy white snow that is beautiful right around christmas time is so fun and pretty. I can't wait to go ice skating over break along with making christmas cookies and making snow angels and building a snowman! I am so excited it should be a really good time. I just hope I don't fall down on campus this year. I fell once last year through the whole winter season! I was so proud of myself so I hope to bring that one time down to zero times! I have been watching the 25 days of christmas on abc family and can I just say that I am disappointed that they are showing cars and the incredibles for the 25 days of christmas????! That is crazy! They have nothing to do with christmas they are even being showed on the day of Christmas! You don't show cars and the incredibles on the day of christmas! What is that all about? I like those movies I mean they are entertaining but not for a christmas special. I was thinking that this year I might want to do something different and tell my parents that whatever they were going to spend on me take that and donate it to a charity of our choice. Each family member would have a certain budget then we would donate that to our charity of choice. I am going to run that by my parents to see what they think. There are many other people out there who need things more than I do. As one of my favorites here is a clip with music to the grinch :)

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Finally close to the end

Doesn't it feel good to know that something you started what seemed like forever ago is finally coming to an end?? I think it feels great! Although sometimes I wonder does the good feeling you get when something is coming to an end depend on what is ending? I think this is true for a lot of things in life. I remember after high school graduation thinking really? is this it? How did this go by so fast and what am I going to do now? It was such a strange feeling. I know that I will never talk to or have connections with some of the people I graduate with I mean c'mon I didn't even know some of the ones that were walking across that stage the same day I did. That's what happens when your graduating class is over 400. It was such a surreal feeling. Another surreal feeling is knowing that I am half way done with my sophomore year of college. How did this happen? I remember yesterday when I was moving into my dorm for the first time with a girl I barely knew and the only way I did know her was through high school and we just so happened to decide to move in together. It was one of the best decisions of my life. I had so much fun with her and she is now one of my best friends. Sometimes it is hard to wrap your mind around the idea that life keeps going after everything no matter what. I think this is a hard concept because you never really know when it is going to end. You don't want it to end most of the time. Getting old is like the plague. It is scary and something you can't change. I am going to embrace getting old and I am going to enjoy my time here on earth and live each day as it is my last. That can be hard sometimes. You think that test, paper, or whatever else is going on in your life is the most important thing but in the end in retrospect it isn't even close. Life will go on with or with out you. life Pictures, Images and Photos

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Chelsea Lately

I love the show Chelsea Lately! I think it is absolutely hilarious that someone is finally saying what is on the public's mind. I love that she is so real and funny. I would like to know more about her story and background to see where she came from and how she got to be where she is today. I really like the way her show is run and I enjoy watching it. I really like E! in general. I think their shows are interesting and entertaining. That is definitely my guilty pleasure watching E!, vh1, MTV, and any other shows like that. I love reality t.v. It's pathetic I know but I just can't get enough of it. I don't really now why people are so obsessed with celebrities and what they are doing in their lives, what they are wearing, who they are dating, and what not but hey, what can ya do? I think a part of it is wanting and wishing you had that life. I mean c'mon who wouldn't want millions of dollars to do what ever you wanted with. On top of that most of the newer celebs around on the reality t.v. shows get money for just doing the show. Look at Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt (who suck by the way) who have done nothing to deserve how much money they have. They are just on the show the hills so they get paid for it. I also think that people think they are entitled to know what goes on in the personal lives of celebrities but in reality if someone was in your face...a complete stranger mind you would you want to answer the most personal questions that have to do with your life? Hell no! But when you go out in search to be a celebrity and it comes true then you complain about not having a normal life Sorry I don't feel any sympathy. What can ya do? Anyways I just thought I would let people know that Chelsea Handler and Chuy are a fun source of entertainment and if you are looking for a new show to get hooked on this is a goodie!

Monday, December 1, 2008

After Break

I hate the first day of classes after break. It's like ripping off a band aid then trying to put it back on. At this point I am so done with classes. I don't have any desire or interest to do anything. Unfortunately the end of every semester is just as important if not more important as the beginning and middle. I can't even believe that I am almost done with my 1st semester of my sophomore year here at Iowa State. That to me is unbelievable. The time has gone by so fast and it doesn't seem to be slowing down. All I have ever wanted is a job and a life outside of school. That life seems close. So close that I can picture it in reality. Before I pictured it in my mind as a dream, something that was so far away it was just fun to day dream about but with it so close in reach is kind of terrifying. With graduation 2 years away it's crunch time. Even though the economy sucks hopefully there are jobs out there. I would be crushed if I went to all this hard work to get nothing out of it. I feel bad for the seniors this year especially. A girl I know had a job lined up for when she got out in a month and it got revoked on account of the economy situation. Now what the heck is she supposed to do? She doesn't have any idea. She told me "ya know they tell you to do all these things, to be involved and get good grades and you do these things and then there is no job at the end. It is so disappointing." I felt so bad for her. I can't imagine what it will be like when I am applying for jobs and there aren't any. At that point you go into a state of panic. Hopefully by the time I get out the economy will be a little better but who knows? Anyways I love this song plus I love the people singing it I think it is beautiful.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thanksgiving Day

On this fine Thanksgiving day I have a lot to be thankful for. I have great family, friends, and life. I couldn't ask for anything more EXCEPT for the cold I have. Of course I would get a cold on a break. Maybe it just caught up to me after being so busy and just finally settling down it just caught up to me. Right now I am at my grandma's and we are going home tomorrow. I am so ready for my own bed. I don't think I can last another night. The house is packed full to the brim and I feel as though I can't breathe. I love my family more than anything but sometimes you need personal space. I can't blow my nose enough I don't think. It's either sniffle, sniffle, sniffle, or blow, blow, blow. I have a fever. Great. This sucks. Other than this stupid cold my break has been pretty nice. I just can't help but think about the pilgrims and the indians on this day. They are always in the back of my mind. What really happened? How did this country really become what it is today? I'm going to go ponder that as well as watch the texas v. texas a & m game. Happy Turkey Day!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

interesting interview


I wanted to share this interview with anyone because I think it is so interesting that electing one person can cause this much emotion and joy to so many people. I also find it fascinating that Will Smith and his family videotaped their day that day. It is also intersting that he uses the idea that now "they" as in African Americans cannot hide behind any more excuses because all is possible in the United States. Just thought I would share this with you :) It makes me happy!

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Ahhhh!

So far this has been one of the worst days of the entire semester! How could things get any worse?? I get up this morning and get ready to drive back and get ready for classes and I walk outside and my windows are all frosted. I am a little irritated on account that it is freezing and I forgot my winter coat at home so I am doing without for the week. I start my car get out scrape my windows so I can at least see out of them start driving down the road then I hear a bump and my car starts leaning to the right. Hmm I thought to myself this road normally isn't this bumpy what's the deal? I realize that my tire is flat so I slow way down which really made the guy behind me mad and pulled over to the side of the road. I get out and realize that my tire is completely flat. I am late to class I call my boyfriend, Dominic, who is in a bad mood about it. He gets there realizes that there is nothing we can do about right at that moment and I need to get to class. I go to class do nothing in class and go to my 2nd class and get a test back that I wasn't very pleased about. I get done with classes get picked up go to my car call the help van who cant even help me in the first place. So I call Decker's to come help me out they come change my tire to put my donut on it and then I have to go back to their place so they can fix it find out that my tire is leaking and has a bulge in it and that my rim is bent. Great. Now I am carless. I dont know when I will be getting my car back on account that Dominic's car for some reason decided it wanted to break down and not start. Come to find out that he needs a new starter so he is going back to Des Moines to give his car to his dad who in return is going to drive him back to Ames where he will be carless once again. So neither one of us has a car. This sucks. The weather sucks I have a crap ton of homework and I dont feel like doing any of it. Sometimes I wonder if things just happen randomly or if it's karma? I like to believe in karma but at the same time I haven't done anything wrong to deserve the karma. Maybe I have in a past life. Who knows. All I know is that today has sucked beyond belief and I can't wait for this week to be over.

Monday, November 17, 2008

Australia


Australia. What a beautiful place. If I could choose one place to go before I die it would probably be there. Other than Paris of course. That is another place I am dying to go to. I am in a bit of a bind at the moment. Feeling anxious to go on break but scared I am going to be bored out of my mind. (Which I probably will be). With no job at home. What a bum I am. I can't find a job and I really need one. I am going to get one 2nd semester here in Ames but for the time being what am I supposed to do? Hopefully work caterings. That is my only option pretty much. I don't want to get a job in Des Moines and only work a month. I guess people might need seasonal help though. Who knows I guess we'll find out when it comes. Only one test this week and it is in about an hour so that's nice. I can't wait until Friday rolls around. A full week of no classes not having to worry about homework or anything like that. I am so excited. Thanksgiving will be so fun. Going early Christmas shopping, the food, being with family it doesn't get much better than that. And another thanksgiving hallmark the macys day parade! With the big balloons that is the best! Since I love hello kitty so much I thought I would put up a big picture of her as a big balloon! That is all for today. I am running for Public Relations chair in my house today and elections are tonight. Wish me luck!

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Lazy sundays

Sundays are the days you just lay around and do nothing unless you absolutely have to. I unfortunately had to do homework. That annotated bibliography is a lot harder than I anticipated. I went to Pella yesterday and watched my friend play football. It was his birthday. They lost which was sad but what can ya do. It was also freezing might I add. The high was 35! It was really fun though and I am glad we went. Even though we missed out on the last ISU game. I felt like it wasn't worth it. I promised my friend I would go see him play football and I did. There will be plenty of other last games.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Before Bed

Thank goodness I get to sleep in tomorrow before I have class at 2:10! Woo hoo! I am so happy. Normally I never get to sleep in. I have class at 9 or 9:30 everyday so it will be nice to sleep in for a change. I am going home to Des Moines tomorrow and hopefully baking cookies with my mom from scratch. Although we don't know the recipe. I will have to find it or get it from my grandma. I remember baking cookies with my grandma all the time when I was little. Very fun times. I think that is why I have such a sweet tooth now. I love sugar. I crave it. Today was definitely a lazy day for me. I went to a lecture though at the Memorial Union at 8 for my JLMC 220 class. It was some what interesting. The people I was sitting by were actually more entertaining than the speaker himself. Oh well it was only an hour. I can't wait to just be on Thanksgiving break! Spend time with family and I am so excited that Dominic is coming to Nebraska with me to be with my family for Thanksgiving. What a nice surprise. I think that is all I have going on right now and I don't feel like going into detail about anything else. I suppose it is time for bed. Good night and don't let the bed bugs bite!

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Miercoles


Miercoles is spanish for Wednesday. I am trying to work on my spanish as much as I can on account that it is apart of my minor kind of. I am ready for a nap that is for sure. I hate having breaks in between classes just not enough time to take a nap or do anything productive. I have a test in my Political Science class tomorrow morning and I am pretty sure it is going to suck. The professor that is doing this portion of the class and he is a horrible teacher! HORRIBLE! What is the point of a study session when you aren't going to give me any information about the test? We were in a lecture hall and he had no microphone. For those who like to sit in the back get punished because we choose to not sit in the front. What crap. Get a microphone so I can hear you and let me know what to study. It isn't that hard. The weather sucks too but the bad news is that it is only going to get worse. One thing to look forward to though is Thanksgiving! Woo Hoo! I am so happy for a break! I am going to my grandma and grandpa's house which is always a good time. It is also going to be nice to have a break from classes and school work. And when Thanksgiving is going on that means Christmas is right around the corner. How exciting.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Jack Frost has arrived.

Finally with much desperation and not wanting him to sneak up on us I think Jack Frost has finally arrived with guns blazing. I had frost on my windows this morning on the way back to the house. Although I had a relaxing weeeknd at home I had to come back and take some tests. Those tests didn't feel so good afterwards but I am hoping for the best. That is all you can do is just hope for the best and pray that it will work out in your best interest in the end. So far my classes are alright except for my stupid meteorology class. That is the worst class I have ever taken in my life. I go to class every day, I do all the assignments and all of the homework, NO OFFERING for EXTRA CREDIT which sucks and do poorly on the tests. I even went to the study session and studied what was on the study slides and only a few of the questions on the test were on the study guide! What the heck?! What is up with that?? The Annotated Bibliography is also kicking my butt with only 12 sources at the moment I am going to have to put it into gear and get the rest of those and put them in alphabetical order. After all it is due on Friday. Hopefully it comes out right since it is 25% of our grade. I know I will be fine just a lot more work than I thought it would be. I sure am glad that I brought my winter coat back to Ames. It is so cold that my Northface just wouldn't do the trick. I guess the good news is that there is only 2 weeks until Thanksgiving break. It can't come soon enough. I need a break from school but there will probably be some homework that needs to be done over break. I can't wait for this semester to be over so I can move on! Fresh start and an easy road all the way into spring break. Speaking of spring break I was thinking...San Francisco or New York perhaps?? Who knows.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Cakes

As I sit here at home and watch the t.v. show Amazing Wedding Cakes on WE I remember when I was little and loved cakes. I love cake. It is the best thing ever to me. All I wanted to be when I was little was a baker. Even though I wanted to be a baker at the Hy-Vee which wouldn't have been the best life choice but that is what I always wanted to do and be. How fun would it be to just bake cakes for a living? I would love that job! Granted it would be hard work but an amazing fun job. Not only are cakes really fun to make they are fun to eat too! I sometimes wonder what I am going to do with my life as a whole but it is so hard to understand in the big picture how things are going to pan out. It matters how much time and hard work you put into your craft and you can't get anywhere with no work and putting zero effort into something. Over all in life I just want to be happy. No matter where I am based on geography I could live far away or close I just want to be happy and loved by those who I care about. Maybe some day I will open my own cake shop and make cakes and make people happy with them. That would really be a dream come true.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

First Week of November

So far November has kicked off into a great start. The weather has been wonderful granted it is going to change by the end of the week, the right guy won the election, and school work is bogging me down. I was so nervous last night on account that I was worried that Obama wouldn't win. As soon as I found out I was so happy that I couldn't hold it in. I had tears of joy. What a monumental event that happened. I was also so excited that Iowa went democratic! How excellent! I felt like I was apart of something bigger than myself. I felt as though my contribution mattered and in retrospect it did. I felt so powerful to have my voice heard. Although I hated the fact that some people are so ignorant. Do you honestly think that Barack Obama is a terrorist? Are you that ignorant?? It just irritates me so much. Some people are so over dramatic. I loved the speeches that they gave last night. So inspiring. Even John McCain's speech was good. I just thought it was funny when he mentioned Barack the crowd booed but then when Barack Obama mentioned John McCain in Chicago the crowd cheered. No booing no hostile feelings just happiness and respect for him. That pleased me and made me proud of the people who voted along with me for the guy that is now our President. I know not everyone will always agree and I don't expect them too but it is so sad when we have people saying that he will get assasinated. I truly hope that doesn't happen. It will be a very sad day for our country. I will be in fear for our country. I think people should come together and realize that we made history last night no matter who you voted for. WE MADE HISTORY! You will be able to tell your kids and grandkids about this moment. God Bless America :)

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Assignment #6- Looking at life through rose colored glasses

When I was young I thought life was easy. I had always gotten anything and everything I wanted. My life was good. I never in the world thought that there were "bad" people. I never thought that my family didn't get along. I didn't know that there was still racism in the United States. Where I came from I had a best friend who was black. Since I could remember black people were just people. Not different just the same as everyone else. I can't remember a specific time that this philosophy changed and I realized that there are racist people all around me. I think just recently as I have started growing up in college that I have realized even more how ignorant people are. I think the most specific time I can remember was just recently at a football game and I was wearing a Barack Obama sticker with some other girls in my house. We found seats and went to stand. There was a boy standing next to me that one of the girls knew. He was in a frat here at Iowa State. I said my hello's and then he suddenly saw my sticker. He said to me, "Do you honestly think that Obama is going to win?" I said back, "Yes I do and I believe that he will win." He replied back to me, "I will never have a black man as my president." That was it. No logical explanation about why he didn't like this man or anything. Just a simple answer that I did not ask for. This is when it truly hit me. That shattered my perception of people of all kind and opened my eyes to how the true colors of a person may matter to some but the colors that come from the insde are the ones that matter to me.

Monday, October 20, 2008

No Class Today !!!! :) woo hoo

This week is Homecoming week which is really fun. Since I am on Cysquad I have a lot of responsibilities throughout the week. I didn't have anything today which was nice. Plus we didn't have class today which was also very nice. I got some grocery shopping done and got ready for our chapter tonight. I don't have a whole lot until Wednesday and then I have class all day, 3 quizzes on that day. I have one test this week and then I have activities on Friday all night. Luckily I am done with my responsibilities for Cysquad are offically over! I'm pretty excited for the homecoming game though! I was pretty happy that we got to 2nd cuts for yell like hell. Hopefully they move onto finals :) I hate that my boyfriend lives with 3 other guys. It's so annoying. He never comes over to my house and hangs out with me oh no that would be horrible. I always have to come over to his apartment and be with guys that are annoying and immature. I don't think guys are ever going to grow up. They will always be immature. I dont have a whole lot to blog about today. Pretty boring day to be honest. I've come to realize that there are just some things you can't change and that is just the way it is.

Sunday, October 19, 2008

In Tribute for Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Lazy Weekend

Don't you sometimes wonder what your meaning of life is? I think of this all the time. I am a reality t.v. junkie and I love to watch people in real life but sometimes I catch myself wondering why they get chances and I don't? I find myself watching t.v. and wondering what my role in life really is. I am so confused and when I think about this topic it irritates and makes me very sad. I would like to think that my role in this life is to bring happiness to others with my smile or my laughter but how do you really know? How do you know what the meaning of life really is? I am feeling less and less reliant on my family and my parents. This makes me feel very sad and feeling lonely. It scares me that I might not need them anymore. I now have to make decisions on my own. Sometimes I get really nervous that I won't make the right decision and screw everything up. I like to talk to others about my problems and stresses in life to see what they think and get their point of view on the problem. The opinions of my friends and family mean a lot to me. I guess everyone else is just too busy to care. They have their own lives to think about. I have a lot of questions and I am not a very religious person but sometimes I go to God and ask him questions. I don't pray a whole lot but when I do I feel at peace. I feel as though I never know that is going to happen in my life. After all it could end tomorrow or today. There are a couple of quotes I like to live my life by and those are: To the world you are one person but to one you may be the whole world. This is important to me because I remember that I am worth being just because I am alive. I have people in my life that are my whole world and if I lost them I would not be who I am today. The other quote I like to live by is live this day as if it were your last. You never know what will happen tomorrow. The inevitable always has a way of crumbling in midflight. There are scary things that happen in the world and I can only hope that those will never happen to those I love. In the video titled Just a Dream by Carrie Underwood these are a concepts she touches on. I know it is just a music video and just a song but music is my therapy. You can compare anything to a certain type of music or a certain song. With the war going on and the new president only 16 days away this music video touches me and reminds me that it can always be taken away.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Rain Rain go away come again some other day...

Big Big test today. I have been studying a lot to make sure I get a good grade. If I do not get a semi- good grade on this test I will probably drop the class on account that I cannot get that bad of a grade on my gpa. It matters to much for one class to mess it up. I have worked hard this semester already trying to do good in all of my classes except for this ONE! I hate science. English, Language, Communication, Journalism, and Political Science anything that has to do with these subjects I can do pretty well on but Math, Science, or anything of that nature no way. I for some reason do not find them interesting and find the subjects extremely boring. Therefore I do not see the point in straining myself to pay attention to something I cannot stand. Anyway, On a new topic I watched some of the debate on Wednesday night and it was intense. I thought the way McCain was acting was childish and immature. Of course a Republican would act in this manner. I loved the way Obama just ignored and stood up for himself when he though McCain did get out of line. This is what America needs. We need a President who isn't afraid to stand up for what is right in belief of all people and a President who will get the job done. The way I look at it is if we were to vote McCain into the White House it would be putting a new head coach in the game expecting a different result of the game. Either way it is still the same Team!!!! McCain says he is not George Bush and obviously this is true, but he has been personal friends with him, agreed with most of the decisions he purposed, and most of all he is the same party. By the way have you seen or heard his VP talk?! She is a lunatic who belongs in a insane asylum! She's nuts! Feed her some peanuts and call it good. Now McCain was my first choice for the Republian Party and since I found out Obama was a candidate I have been a fan. I have read his books and the are fabulous! I would highly suggest reading them. And can I just say this weather sucks! It is cold and rainy and wet. Horrible fall weather. We had to miss the hayrack ride this year on account of the rain. I was pretty upset. I do like this video of Rhianna and T.I. though.


P.S. Only 18 days until Nov. 4th Get Excited :)

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Brrrr.....



Today was pretty darn cold out! I must say though that I somewhat liked it. The leaves falling and the warm autumn colors are coming through making it fun to walk in the leaves on the way to class just to hear them crunch underneath your feet. I love fall. Fall and summer are the best seasons by far. The only reason to like winter is the first snowfall and santa clause. By the way I really really want to take a picture with the fake santas at the mall with my boyfriend. I think it would rock and be super fun! Today in class we watched commercials and compared them to each other and dissected them. I like to do this in class but at times it can be frustrating. I don't like to think that much and I am already a cynical person so going through step by step why the advertisers do what they do irritates me. At times it can be fun too. I like to hear the purposes behind things and how it affects other people and myself included. I'm really not looking forward to writing my rhetorical analysis paper. It doesn't sound appealing to me at all. I am still stressed about classes and other things. Now my parents are pretty much begging me to get a job. I do not have time for a job! I am too involved with other things but after Homecoming week I really don't have a choice! All in all I have had a not so good week and I can't wait for it to be over. I can't wait for next week to be over either.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Ahhhh!

I am so stressed out!

Everything is getting to me and catching up to me all at once! I do not think I did so good on my Spanish exam today which really makes me upset. I think that I need to focus on my studies more as a student and allow myself to do good things. I have never really "learned" how to study and it gets frustrating when I do really good on all of my assignments and get them in on time and participate in class then bomb the tests. Pretty much that's how it is in every class and it is so annoying! I am such a horrible test taker! I can't afford another bad gpa! My average is a 2.8 which isn't horrible its a B- I think? But still I want better! These stupid gen eds suck and I hate them! I just want to take classes that interest me and that are for my major! We also have Homecoming next week which will be fun but busy. Since I am on cysquad I have a lot of responsibilities to uphold. I think I want to be a Greek Week aide but I am not so sure yet. I have to get a good gpa that is all I can think about. I am honestly contemplating dropping my Meteorology 206 class and picking up another class but being 6 weeks in it feels like a waste to just drop it already. I don't know what else to do. I will have to think about it and see how this next test goes on Friday to see if I even have a chance of passing. If not I will just pick up an online class or a one credit course once a week. That sounds like a good plan to me at this point. I am so sick of my class shedule anyway. I can't wait until next semester. This semester has sucked so bad for me. I am not a happy camper :(!

Monday, October 13, 2008

Monday Mornings are no fun!

Of course monday mornings are no fun! I can't wait for Thanksgiving break! It will be much needed. First I have to get through homecoming, Halloween, and another I-week. Sheesh! My life is oh so busy. Sometimes I wish I could have a week off of everything and just be by myself! This week I only have 2 tests which is nice. Tonight we are going on a hayrack ride pending on the weather so hopefully it doesn't rain because I love the hayrack ride it is so much fun! I have some stuff for Homecoming that I have to do on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday but it is only about an hour a day so that isn't bad at all. I really hope my meteorology test goes well. I know what to study now I think?! I get so nervous about tests they really are no fun at all! Mid terms are also due this Friday which is nervewracking. I know I will at least have 1 midterm hopefully no more than that! The Nebraska game is this weekend which I am really excited for! My parents are going to come up and go to the game so that will be fun. I was born in Nebraska so I am a Husker fan at heart!

And I can't believe that next week is Homecoming already! That is crazy! At least I am on the other side of it working with HCC! That is really exciting and I just found out last week that I am the PR Cy Capatain which is awesome! I was really excited about it! The following week we are meeting with President Geoffory for dinner at my sorority so he and his wife are going to come. That is pretty cool if you ask me! I better get going!
P.S. Only 4 weeks until voting day!(Get out and vote!)

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Weekly blog assignment #6

Introduction/Thesis: In Dove Onslaught advertisement the main three things to analyze is the music, the little girl in the ad, and the images within the video including the pace and order of them and the main message is to talk to your daughter before the beauty industry does.
1. The music within the Dove ad is upbeat and peppy. The title of the music playing is "Here it comes". The artist is unknown. When the video starts the little girl is staring a blank stare and the music starts in and it states here it comes. Then the ads start coming and the music picks up.
2. The little girl in the video has red hair and she is really young. She has a blank stare on her face at the very beginning of the video and as the music gets louder and more crazy her face turns into a little smirk.
3.The images within the video are crazy and fast paced. They go in order from where it starts to where it ends. An example of this is the billboards, music videos, dieting and products that can "fix" you, to checking your weight and the weight going on and off, to exercising and eating, to throwing up what you have eaten in the toilet, and to the most extreme plastic surgery.
Conclusion: The overall main purpose of this video and the effect that dove wants to have on us is that their products are better than the others and that they believe in real beauty and not the fake things. They want to impact women to talk to their daughters and by buying dove products they are doing their daughters a favor and eliminating all other options of self failure to pass on. The advertisement is also showing that you have to talk to your daughters first before it is too late.

Weekend Recap

Friday after class I had to run home and get ready for Initiation for our new members which was really stressful. I can't go into detail about what happens during initiation but it Is a pretty long process. Overall though it was worth it. I love our new members they are so fun and fresh! I especially love my little sis. I am so glad I got to meet her and that we are big and lil together. It make me happy. J After that I went over to Dominic's apartment and went to bed early around 11:45 and didn't wake up to my alarm at 7:30. I had to be at Eaton to pick up some girls to be at the house by 7:45 am for memory walk in the morning. That really sucked. I woke up at 7:50 so I was late. Luckily Angela went to pick up the newbies. And I wasn't counted absent which makes me so happy so now I don't have to pay a fine. I hope I got all of my study hours done this week otherwise I will have used up my only warning. After memory walk I went home to Des Moines and hung out with the family until around 8ish and then went to a friends birthday party. It was her 21st! so she got a party bus and we went to different bars downtown. It was so fun and I am so happy I went. Now I am sitting at home waiting to go back to Ames to get some homework done and I really want a nap. I still have to do Assignment 6 but I will do that later. Ttyl!

Friday, October 10, 2008

Fridays

Fridays sometimes are fun other times suck. Especially when you have class from 4-5. That really sucks. On Fridays all you want is to be done with the week and have fun on the weekend. Most of the time my weekends are just as busy if not more busy than my weekdays. Luckily I get to go home this weekend on Saturday I think. We have Initiation tonight at 5 until midnight roughly. Where did my life go? Why do I have to do all these things that I do not look forward to or that I do not want to do. It gets old doing things over and over again. Especially things you do not want to do but have to do. I tell myself that no one can make me do anything, but not doing these things would eventually just cause me more trouble in the end so I might as well just do them and get them over with and move on with my life. Although this week has been pretty easy for me. No tests except 2 quizzes in Spanish on Wednesday which I bombed. In my defense we have not had class all week so we were put in there blind not knowing what to expect. Since it has been I-week all week we have had different things to do with that. My allergies are acting up as usual. I hate having allergies they suck! I also have a eye problem so I have had to go to the eye doctor twice this week which is not fun. Luckily I like my eye doctor he is pretty cool but other than that it sucked. He gave me some drops but ultimately it doesn't matter because my eyeball still hurts and all he could tell me was that it was from allergies. But when my eye started hurting I didn't have allergies so I know he is full of it. Oh well. I slept late today which felt nice but sleeping so much you feel more tired throughout the day. Sometimes I feel as though I just can't win. Don't you feel like that sometimes? I really just want to curl up tonight and watch a movie by a fire with some popcorn cuddled next to the person that I love. And if this was at all possible this is the movie that I would watch...

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

October 7, 2008

At my sorority tonight we had our big sis revealing through a candle passing. It's super fun. I love my little sis and I hope she was surprised and happy to find out that I was her big sis. This week is called I-week on account that the new members are being initiated on Friday so we have different events all week. and the older members get their "daughters" presents throughout the week. I love Iweek except for Initiation itself which takes forever! but i love my sisters and they make me very very happy! Speaking of sisters I can't wait until the sisterhood of the traveling pants comes out on dvd!

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Class



How boring is class. Honestly. We all sit here (all 200 of us) and listen to crap we could care less about. And we call that education? Yes I understand that we want the people coming out of college and going into the "real world" to be well rounded and educated on all subjects but...do you think I will ever remember how to measure the dew point?! Hell NO! So why am I forced to take a class that will not make me a better student or a better person. It will not only bring my gpa down because when you are not interested in a class for me at least you do not give a crap. Therefore you do what you have to to get by and dont really care about a grade because you can't wait for the class to be over with so you can move on with your life and move on to something you actually find interesting. Another thing that I don't find fun is going to any type of doctor. Anyone who likes to do this is out of thier mind. I feel like I am falling a part at the seams. My neck hurts, my back hurts, my feet hurt, and even my eyeballs hurt. I am going to the eye doctor today. Thank goodness. I can't wear my contacts which sucks because I hate wearing my glasses all the time. I should get that lasik eye surgery and I will eventually even if I have to take out a loan. ugh. At least I like this song and it cheers me up! :)

Monday, October 6, 2008

Week #5 Assigned Blog


The next few months flew by each day getting harder and harder to look at the prince. She knew the burning inside of her would not go away. She also knew that he was growing closer and closer to the edge. She tried to steer clear of his temper and understood that if she crossed that line there would be consequences. As the summer faded into the fall and after the fall turned into the winter she sometimes could not get herself out of bed. She dreaded looking into the once innocent eyes of her fair prince. The days were dark and dreary and she felt as if she had nothing to look forward to. The winter eventually turned into spring and before you know it the spring had some how formed into summer. One year had gone by and the day that stood out in her mind so much was now a mear memory in the past. But to her it was still as clear as the sky was that day. She feels remorse and guilt. Should she have told her husband the truth? Was she the one to blame? What could she have done to stop what happened that day? Those were the questions brewing in her mind all the time. The princess realizes that it will never go away this pain and her heart will always feel like there is a hole in the middle of it. This feeling will stay with her until the day she dies.

Friday, October 3, 2008

Finally October!

So I am officially excited that it is October! Probably one of my favorite months out of the year other than June and December! This year the beginning of November will be super exciting as well just because of the elections. I am so excited to vote for the very first time! I hope everyone votes because it is not only a privilege to vote it is an honor. I am currently waiting on my absentee ballot to come in but after that I am going through every step and making sure i am doing the right thing at the right time so my vote counts. I want to make sure the man I want in office will make it there with my help.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

September 28th, 2008

Lately life has been pretty good. Although I have not been doing so great in my Meteorology 206 class. Our first test was on Friday and I am thinking that I didn't do so hot. I even went to the study session and still nothing. I missed the Presidential debate which I was pretty upset about. I heard mixed things according to others. Some have said Obama won 70 to 30 others said it was an even draw. I didn't get to see it so I am terribly upset. I went to the Obama rally on Saturday though in the Design building and got to see Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore. That was really fun. A girl asked me, "Are you here for the political part of it or just to see Ashton?" I thought in my mind why else would I be here?? Of course I am here for the political side of things. Duh?! Some people are just simple minded I suppose. There were even some McCain lovers there. Give me a break. Go to your own candidates functions instead of mooching off of mine. How obnoxious. A lot was going on this weekend also. We had bus party for our sorority on Friday and the theme was Welcome to the Jungle. That was fun. I had an old cavewoman costume that I wore. It's always fun getting ready for the night. I like living with my best friends! All 60 of them! Gotta go do some homework! Bye!! Cant wait to see this movie!

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Tuesday Night


I am so sick of the hot weather cold weather thing. It definitely keeps me on my toes. I went home a week ago and got all of my warm clothes thinking it was going to be "fall" weather. It has since been hot one day and cold and rainy the next. I for some reason feel so tired. I took a 3 hour nap today after my classes. Unfortunately I had to wake up and go to PRSSA which has so far been really fun and interesting. After that I went to tan and then went to good ol wal mart. The wal marts in small towns are so much nicer than the ones in big cities. The wal mart by my house in Des Moines is really dirty. In a small town not so much. It has more of a community feeling. Sometimes I wonder how the people who live in small towns do it but in some sense I think I would really like it. You know everyone, you are comfortable, things are simple. But there is always a downfall to that. I suppose there are good and bad to all things in life. That is just how life is. It is never black and white it is colorful. That reminds me of the movie Pleasantville with Toby Mcguire and Reese Whitherspoon. Great movie. It shows just what life is about. Change and adapting to that change and making it positive. That is what life is all about.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Youtube identity video


The video I chose for the identity portion was a music video. It was Jessica Simpson's 'I belong to me' video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X71iJPMCjFs I chose this video because it represents her and how she was feeling at the time. I also relate to this video and when I saw it I was moved. The video goes through different places where she is at in her house/ apartment and how she tells how she is not anyone elses property but more her own. I have always learned that no guy can persuade me or "own" me. I like how she cuts her hair and moves on and lets go of her old feelings and moves on. I can feel her hurt in the video and the emotion she captures. I sometimes feel that same emotion and feeling. Maybe not about the same concept but definitely the same feeling. Sometimes I feel as though people even myself expect too much and I am overwhelmed and I feel like I only belong to me not the whole world. This video came out after Jessica got divorced with her husband, Nick Lachey, and I think she felt this way. I could understand if she did. I think a lot of women end up in relationships they do not want to be in just because they don't know how to get out. Most men like to feel in control and women let them take control of their selves. It's hard to watch women lose themselves when they get boyfriends or husbands. It's almost like they just waste away so much time of their life. This video relates to my identity because it is how I feel about myself and I know that I need to be respected. I belong to me and no one else.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Sept. 17th

I am currently thinking about cutting my hair. The appointment is made for tomorrow and I am crossing my fingers hoping it turns out ok. I am sure it will I am just a little nervous. I have been trying to grow my hair for almost a year and it is only half way down my back. I wanted long hair for such a long time but it just won't grow anymore! So frustrating! So far I have been doing good in class I think. Once again hopefully. I can't wait to be done with school and I still have 2 and a half years left! I want to be done with a job. I think I complain to much most of the time. I need to STOP!!!! Sheesh at least I am going to college. I guess I just don't have much to write about today. It was hot today. That was a plus. My professor for Meteorology said we were going through a "indian summer". In other terms it is just a late warm weather. Well I am going to go study for my spanish test. See ya later!

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Assigned blog #2

I was walking to class one day minding my own business walking past the greenhouse and out of the corner of my eye I saw something small flash by. I ignored my sighting thinking it was just a bunny or a squinny running along trying to find food for the winter when all of a sudden I saw this figure again. This time I saw it more clear. I thought it looked like a dwarf but why would a dwarf be here? At Iowa State? This was impossible, but my curiosity got the best of me and I felt as if I were drawn to the greenhouse. I have always just walked by the greenhouse not thinking anything of it and assuming you had to have permission to go in. As I heard a door slam around the corner I knew the dwarf like creature had gone into the greenhouse through that door. I walked up to the door and peeked in like a kid looking through a frosted window at Christmas time admiring a toy they want under the tree. I felt rediculous. How can this be happening? I opened the door and to my surprise I saw nothing. I felt nothing. I thought to myself what is the deal? As soon as I was about to walk out the door I heard a bustling in the bushes. I walked over to the bushes pushed the brush aside and to my amazement I saw another world. There were leaves as big as I was, spiraled leaves mixed amongst one another and hanging plants with what looked like hair growing off of them. As I walked closer and closer to the "other world" I saw tall grass sprouting from the ground, flowers cascading around other green plants, I saw leaves with the packers colors, deep emerald and sharp yellow. I caught up to the dwarf and he was sure startled to see me. He then explained to me that this was a place for ISU botanists to come and plant new things and do experiments with them. He showed me around a while more showing me razorblade shaped plants, sharp pointy cactus, a bridge over looking a calming waterfall flowing into a pond with gold and black spotted fish in it. There were bright purple orchids which smelled like spring and a plant that moved after you touched it. It was a beautiful place with beautiful smells, and visions. Soon as my tour came to an end the dwarf explained to me that it was time to go but I was welcome anytime! Let's just say this will not be my last experience in the greenhouse.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Busy week


I sometimes wonder if I will ever have a week when I have nothing to do. I think it is impossible. I am always busy and always doing something. I also wish I would have taken different classes or put them in a different schedule. I hate my schedule. I have hour or 2 hour breaks in between all of them. So irritating. It is also very hard to go to class when you have breaks in between compared to one after the other. So far I haven't missed one class! I am so proud of myself. (haha) I like to get my stuff done and its nice to have little study breaks in between i guess but for the most part i definitely learned my lesson after this semester. I just keep telling myself only 3 months. It's so crazy that we are in school for 3-4 months then a new semester comes. I can't believe we have been in classes for almost a month as of next week! It has gone by so fast already. I can't wait to be a senior! I just don't want to get an internship. I know I have to and my parents already want to start looking for one for the summer of 09! That really sucks. I wanted to go on a trip to Spain or somewhere in that area in the summer but thats all gone away with the thought of a full time internship. makes me so sad :( I really want to travel. I have never been to another country. I want to go to Europe so badly. ugh. thinking about it makes me depressed.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Monday


Don't you just hate mondays?? I know I do. First day back to class after a nice fun weekend. Sometimes I can't wait to get back to class I know after long breaks I am wanting to start up again. But most of the time doing nothing except sleeping, eating, and breathing is necessary. The game Saturday was super fun Iowa State won! So that was exciting. One more win and we will be on an official winning streak! WooHoo! I am on Cysquad so I had a meeting on Sunday to learn a skit we have to perform on Wednesday in front of 800 people! Wow! But it should be fun overall. I am also trying to find a job at the moment. For some reason I just can't find one that sounds interesting. I applied last week to a few places and no calls back yet. Just my luck. I did Destination Iowa State as a Team Leader before school started and we got paid $200 so I am still waiting for that check. Although it should be anytime now! I need the money. I think my friends and I are going to go to Iowa City this weekend which should be fun. My best friend lives in Iowa City and goes to Iowa so we are going to stay with him. I am pretty excited but I know not to wear anything Iowa State. I heard the fans there are really mean and obnoxious especially when it comes to Iowa State. I guess that is all for now I can't think of anything else to write about! So long:)

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Week One Assignment

Dorothy Allison reveals her identity in many ways throughout her essay. The first thing that caught my eye revealing her identity was when she says, "what was she thinking, this photographer who wanted to sprinkle me with sugar? Who did she think I was? Was she planning some rude joke I only barely comprehended?" This stood out to me because she is a strong woman. This is obvious because she stood her ground and knew that sprinkled powdered sugar on her in a photograph was not the image she wanted to portray in any way, shape or form. Another quote that Dorothy says is I have my mama's hips, full and lush, and her mouth, too often clamped subbornly tight. She understands what she looks like and knows her faults as well as the good things about herself. When finding identity this is a hard concept to grasp. She also says she believed herself a new creature, who would never wake up early to put on a girdle or put on makeup before going to class when she was in college. Her mother and sisters did this everyday and she saw them doing it and decided to be her own person and not follow in their footsteps. This is important because she knew and listened to herself. That is a part of finding your identity. The significance of the photographers request to have powdered sugar on her in the photo is that Dorothy grew up in a house where women we looked at as "cute" and had to be done up to play the role women were supposed to play during the time of her childhood. This reminded her of those times and days. Allison's attitude towards the pose in the end of the essay is almost making fun of those women who do play that role and do their laundry who wouldn't mind getting powdered sugar poured on them during a photoshoot. She isn't that type of woman and knows it there fore she plays along with it sarcastically. She views this moment a part of her identity in my opinion as both present and past. The present because she doesn't want to be sprinkled with powdered sugar in the photoshoot because she is not a "dolled up" kind of gal. Also as a part of her past becuase she saw the women that would allow a photo just like the one the photographer was requesting. As a result of growing up around these types of women she herself did not want to become one. I think the photos are authentic because they are real. They do not have a sugarcoat on them and they tell the truth. Dorothy Allison is a real woman with real opinions who knows herself and her identity. The photographers request to Dorothy was a little silly considering she knows herself and knows that the photo the photographer was suggesting was not staying true to herself and her identity.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Cold Cloudy Day


Another coldish cloudy day. These are the kind of days that make you want to crawl back into bed and sleep all day. They especially make you not want to go to class. Luckily I am done for the day and instead of sleeping I am attempting to do some homework. I never have any problem normally studying and getting things done but for some reason lately I just cannot study. I get distracted so easily even though I know I need to do some studying I just can't. It is actually really depressing. To be completely honest I hate school. I think a lot of the time what classes we are taking as freshman and sophomore are a waste of time and money. As a Journalism major I have taken 3 classes, two my first semester here at ISU and a workshop 2nd semester and then another just this semester. Other than that I have taken zero classes that will help me achieve the main goal of coming to college. I guess I am just cranky today on account that I have to study instead of actually wanting to. At least I get to read a pretty cool book for Political Science. What really happened. A book about the Bush Administration and since I hate Bush I am interested in what this book has to say. Well I better get going since I have a lot more reading to do.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

My dog

I miss my dog! I can't wait to go home over labor day weekend to see her.